Adventure modules that didn't quite make it.......

Posts: 981 · Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 2:07 am

BR1 The Isle of Bread.

Travel by sea to this dangerous isle, ruled by the forbaken bread lord Troumlebaker........

Armed with a rolling pin + 1 (club-type weapon) and croissant-bow, can you defeat such denizens as the fearsome bread troll, the giant baguette (bigger and scarier than its smaller cousin the Bulette), or the Pumbernickel Hulk?

And there are allies too, hidden in the jungle is a secret village of brownies (don't eat them). Mages may even find a Sourdough-dragon to help as a familiar. Tricks and traps abound, don't eat that black pudding and steer clear of the wight bread. It's not good for your health. There is even a lake with a hidden leviathan - a briocheosaurus!!!!

Famed relics such as the Ring of telekinetic-levitation (cakes not rising as they should?), the Baking Stone of controlling flour elementals, and ryes of charming (there is an evil succubus with two of them, what, that an an enchanted crumpet).

So, no more loafing around - hunt down this module online today.

(please add more rare titles and descriptions below)

Posts: 554 · Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 8:21 am

There's actually a bread-themed dungeon in WG7 Castle Greyhawk. You meet some Pillsbury doughboy type and encounter a baddie who tries to cook you or bake a doppleganger of you. Weird stuff....and not that good. Confused

Posts: 981 · Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 7:36 pm

I am actually competing with Arnold J. Rimmer (Red Dwarf) for the World Procrastinator Championship. It must be my body's defence mechanism to escape from thesis writing - weird thoughts pop into my head and won't go away - as in this case (The Isle of Bread). I have a pythonesque sense of humour and love absurdity.

If anyone shares my insanity (....there is a pleasure in being mad that none but madmen know....) and needs to get some of those weird eddies of their psyche out (...like, say, if the Secretary General of the UN was giving a serious interview, suddenly stuck on a clown nose and sang 'I'm a Yankee doodle dandy', then calmly pocketed the nose and got back to his interview....) feel free to post here.

Actually I thought this could sort be a fun module parody thread.... clown

Posts: 1002 · Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 8:06 pm

Bread-Undead...

once slain they automatically re-animate (only those made with self-raising flour..LOL)

Brette:)

Posts: 42 · Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 9:01 pm

beasterbrook wrote:

Bread-Undead...

once slain they automatically re-animate (only those made with self-raising flour..LOL)

Brette:)

Then the title of the adventure would be "The Yeast of Your Problems".

Posts: 5870 · Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 9:21 pm

How about the cluster f**k that was known as "The Realm of No!"?

Posts: 3156 · Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2008 6:41 am

It's nice to know you don't expect to make any dough from this, I mean we all knead to just be creative sometimes. So keep rising to the occasion yeast we forget were some of our ideas come from.
A toast to you!

ShaneG.

Posts: 766 · Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2008 9:24 am

Of course since I manage a real bakery, I have to recuse myself here. Otherwise I'd add a few rye comments.

Posts: 235 · Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:38 pm

When I first read the title, I thought this was a pretty crumby module, but felt my party could rise to the occassion. Buoyed by our recent success in Candy Land, we felt certain we could depose the Bread Lord thereby becoming the upper crust ourselves. Plus, to be quite honest, we kneeded the dough after all.

To prepare for our quest, we sought the advice of the mage Quincy - home of the Big Fat Yeast Roll (sorry American reference here.) After meeting with his chief baker, who was rather Frank with us, we were granted an audience. Quincy cautioned us to beware of the magic rolling pin, which in his opinion, was the best thing since sliced bread. Further the bread lord had many devious and evil allies who would come to his aid and would never be caught loafing. Quincy, inspired by the party's courage and determination and secretly coveting the legendary recipe book, gifted each member one of his fabled Buns of Steel to be used in times of great kneed.

Armed with our newfound knowledged, we headed yeast towards the Isle of the Bread Lord. To lift our spirits, the party's bard sang joyous songs of Hoagies Heroes and how they defeated the dastardly Kaiser Roll and his crusty hordes of croutons. The going was tough and many times the ranger found that the trail was stale. But still we pressed on until even our steadfast wizard thought he was going crackers for the land was filled with many beautiful and deadly flours. Further reducing our progress was a touch and go battle with a baker's dozen of long-armed matzah monkeys. Several times as battle ensued we thought we were toast but in the end, we triumphed and twisted their limbs into pretzels.

Finally, passing under SugarLoaf Mountain we emerged into the daylight on a cliff overlooking the Bay of Bagels. And in the center of the bay the object of our quest, the Isle of the BreadLord. We recalled the last words of Quincy as we pondered our next move.... "I pita the fool who tries to roll into that wicked land without taking the end pieces first." Not really sure what he meant, the party built a raft from bread sticks and made their way to the island. The toast was clear so we came ashore under cover of darkness. At this point the party's thief began to waffle. "I don't want to do this anymore. This is just another half-baked scheme to make some quick dough." Moving closer to his fearful friend, the bard said, "Just think. If we pull this off, we'll be the toast of the town." With the thief's nerves calmed, a defensive camp was built and the party's druid collected some dough nuts from nearby trees for the evening meal. The party slept fitfully that night with thoughts of the upcoming battle and visions of gingerbread men dancing in their heads . Smile

Posts: 1285 · Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:46 pm

(I never thought I'd get the chance to post this here...)

Somewhere in the depths of the pleasant smells radiating from Drury Lane lives a man, a Muffin Man, an aged wizard of ill-repute and unsurpassed skill whose life's goal has been the creation of an enchanting golem known colloquially as the Gingerbread Man. From accounts of barely living adventurers who've reported encountering this bane, it is made of parts of extra virgin ginger, gin with guanine water, and ginkgo biloba. Atop this intoxicating body, a layer of gooey gumdrop buttons is traced, followed with lines of delicate frosting piping, sometimes even covered with chocolate or other inestimable goodies. It is said the Muffin Man has created these for one purpose: to end the reign of terror imposed by The Cookie Monster - perhaps, in the distant past, The Cookie Monster invaded the Muffin Man's kitchen laboratory and devoured everything in sight and the Muffin Man has held an unyielding grudge since... or, perhaps, the Muffin Man is simply insane. None know, and any who have sought the truth have come away with larger stomaches, toothaches, and wild tales of living edibles.

So, if you are brave, adventurer, step forth and come battle for knowledge. We must get to the bottom of this myth...

The Cookie Monster

No. Encountered: 1 (Unique)
Size: Medium
HD: 3(d8)
Move: 30 feet, 10 feet (climb)
AC: 14
Attack: Bite 2d4
Special: Sugar Rush, Cookie Monster
Saves: P
Int: Low
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Type: Monstrous Humanoid
Treasure: Special (see below)
XP Value: 55 +5

The Cookie Monster (one must always refer to this fearsome being as such, for there is only one such creature in all of the realms) is a man-sized blue cookie-eating fanatic, whose single purpose, apparently, is the destruction of well-baked kuchen goods. It is unknown if The Cookie Monster is male or female, but it seems to have a preference for consumables with peanut butter or chocolate chips - many a baker has feared the utterance of The Cookie Monster's only known war-cry: "C is for Cookie, its good enough for Me!" Despite the appalling lack of goodwill shown to children through munching any, and all, cookies possible, they seem to be attracted to the beast - perhaps the bobbling eyes and soft blue fur make them at ease... or it is a fell guise of the most demonic sort - none, so far, have been willing to investigate. The Cookie Monster seems to lack any teeth, perhaps rotted away from the senseless forays into mad sugar consumption have affected it, leaving it with a voracious maw of non-stop demand.

Combat: Unless one is a cookie, one has little to fear from The Cookie Monster. However, in those instances, The Cookie Monster is unstoppable. It attacks with vengeance borne from madness and hunger, an insatiable drive to crunch and taste that would make even the most edacious sick with envy.

Sugar Rush: Should The Cookie Monster devour a cookie, regardless of the amount, type, size, or flavor, it gains all the abilities of a 20th level barbarian and monk, and can use its bite attack as many times as there are cookies to be eaten; these additional attacks must be directed at the cookies, fortunately.

Cookie Monster: The Cookie Monster can swallow any cookie on a natural attack roll of 12 or higher, even if that would ordinarily miss the armor class of the cookie - in this case, the cookie is not destroyed instantly, but suffers three times normal damage. Lastly, should another try to steal, or take a cookie away from The Cookie Monster, The Cookie Monster is considered a 30 HD monster, or 10 levels higher than the would-be thief, whichever is higher.

Special: Due to its great experience with, and connoisseurship of all things cookie, there is a wealth of information available from The Cookie Monster. In its lair, rumored to be a hidden bakery somewhere on Sesame Street, there resides a tome of pastry significance. Within its pages lie the recipes for every known cookie, several of magical ability, and more of as-yet undiscovered quality and property. Any culinary student would be amazed at its contents. Castle Keepers are advised to treat this enchiridion as an artifact of immense power.

Posts: 3156 · Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2008 1:32 pm

D'oh

ShaneG.

Posts: 2448 · Posted: Sun Aug 03, 2008 12:45 am

Crumbs

Posts: 202 · Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2008 12:07 pm

Will this be set in Ravenloaf? the demiplane of Bread?

Oh the punnage.. the punnage

Posts: 981 · Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2008 6:38 pm

OUr cleric can realy slice his enemies. Each piece of vanilla slice +2 that leaves his sling does serious damage. He can be a little too pie-ous though.

Posts: 766 · Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2008 6:58 pm

Many thieves carry a Bagel of Burglary (it's great with lox).

Posts: 573 · Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2008 10:24 am

It has been rumoured there is an ancient monastery of monks, who practice the deadly ancient Chinese art of 'Cookie Dough'. Shocked

Posts: 981 · Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 7:21 am

This thread and its contributions epitomise what Roll Playing Games are all about!